Clive is the Principal of the Clive Murphy Self Empowerment Centre, a product, coaching and seminar business that empowers people to achieve their life potential.He is the author of four books relating to confidence, self esteem, relationships, motivation to lose weight and controlling how you feel.
The World Is Crashing ...
OK, this is not physically happening.
However, it appears to be "crashing" emotionally.
From working with thousands of people over a 22 year period, I am noticing people are becoming more stressed, angry, discontent and frustrated.
Life is now being lived at a much faster pace. There is more pressure to succeed than ever before. HSC (or Year 12) students tell me they are doing it tough with all the pressure to do well and to get into the course of their choice.
Statistics show depression, anxiety, stress and drug use are all on the rise.
So, how do we stop this?
One simple way is to ...
Be Accountable
When things are going wrong, people will either ‘put their head in the sand', ‘tell lies' or ‘blame'.
To ‘put your head in the sand' (to be in denial) is to not want to recognize what is happening. Two excellent examples are alcoholics and gamblers who say "I have it all under control".
Not wanting to see ‘that which is real' means the same behaviour and mindset will continue tomorrow, and the next day, and the next. Nothing changes.
Same with telling untruths (lies). You instantly divert the attention from yourself to elsewhere. This means you do not have to be accountable.
Blame is great. It takes the spotlight off you and places it elsewhere. "They're to blame for how I feel". "It's their fault this is happening to me". "The company's lack of marketing is why my sales are low".
When you blame, there is only one solution.
The people you are blaming have to change or do something to fix the problem.
If you are waiting for someone else to change or to fix the problem, how long are you going to be waiting for?
I would suggest a long long time.
When you blame, who is in control?
Those that you blame.
Your happiness is dependent on whether they fix the problem or not.
Blaming seldom brings a new result.
What if Someone Is To Blame?
Say, someone runs into your car in the car park. Sure, they are to blame.
Blaming them is not going to change the dent in your car. It's simply going to make you an angry person.
The switched-on person will switch from the problem to the solution and look at possibilities:
- I can try and find out who did it
- I can get a quote to get the dent fixed
- I can get it fixed and perhaps claim it on my insurance
- I can leave it
Through taking responsibility for what is happening in your life, you are now able to move forward.
Take ownership of what is happening to you. It's the quickest and easiest way to achieve what you desire.
Good luck.